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Dec. 31st, 2010 06:42 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
suckmy12inchSo, New Year's Eve. Exciting stuff. ...Heh, not really this year, we're not doing anything special. I was thinking earlier that 2010 for me has been a year with both the highest points and the lowest points of my life so far - one long rollercoaster.
High points include the London Expo in May and finally meeting the rest of the Britcrew from DDD. I'd been worried beforehand that it'd be ~SUPAH AWKWARD~ but now, after having hung out wht everyone a few times, and after another Expo together, I don't know what I was ever worried about. Possibly the best weekend of my life so far.
Another would be getting into uni after the scare I had because of clearing and all that. And to be honest, I think I'm happier at Lampeter than I probably would have been anywhere else. I'm studying the things I love, with great lecturers and I've made some brilliant friends.
And then late May/June was just one big dark, low point that, unless I have a darker time, will forever be the worst time of my life. ...Dramatic, yeaaaah, but whenever I look back at that point, I kind of get scared all over again. I was freaking out because of exams, feeling horribly, horribly alone for some stupid reason, and I get scared because I can remember how often I thought that surely this couldn't be worth it. Surely anything would be better than constantly hurting, even if 'anything' turned out to be 'nothing'. They weren't pleasant thoughts to have and I never acted on them and now I don't think I would have acted - but still, that wasn't much fun.
Obviously I got over all that and heh to be frank, it's sort of nice to get that off my chest. Maybe a resolution for next year should be not to keep things bottled up as much as I do, and as much as I have done this past year. I have so many people to thank, really, for helping me get through that shitty time and reminding me that in the end, it totally was worth it.
And to end on a good note: got my fencing breeches today. Excellent.
Anyway, Happy New Year to everyone ♥
High points include the London Expo in May and finally meeting the rest of the Britcrew from DDD. I'd been worried beforehand that it'd be ~SUPAH AWKWARD~ but now, after having hung out wht everyone a few times, and after another Expo together, I don't know what I was ever worried about. Possibly the best weekend of my life so far.
Another would be getting into uni after the scare I had because of clearing and all that. And to be honest, I think I'm happier at Lampeter than I probably would have been anywhere else. I'm studying the things I love, with great lecturers and I've made some brilliant friends.
And then late May/June was just one big dark, low point that, unless I have a darker time, will forever be the worst time of my life. ...Dramatic, yeaaaah, but whenever I look back at that point, I kind of get scared all over again. I was freaking out because of exams, feeling horribly, horribly alone for some stupid reason, and I get scared because I can remember how often I thought that surely this couldn't be worth it. Surely anything would be better than constantly hurting, even if 'anything' turned out to be 'nothing'. They weren't pleasant thoughts to have and I never acted on them and now I don't think I would have acted - but still, that wasn't much fun.
Obviously I got over all that and heh to be frank, it's sort of nice to get that off my chest. Maybe a resolution for next year should be not to keep things bottled up as much as I do, and as much as I have done this past year. I have so many people to thank, really, for helping me get through that shitty time and reminding me that in the end, it totally was worth it.
And to end on a good note: got my fencing breeches today. Excellent.
Anyway, Happy New Year to everyone ♥
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Happy New Year, dear Elata :3
Date: 2011-01-03 04:52 pm (UTC)may many of your wishes become true this year, along with TONS of love, luck and success for you. Sometimes resolutions aren't bad to think about. Especially the end of every year is a chance to leave a part of the negative experiences behind in one way or another, allowing to find faith for the future. I'm glad most of the things you went through were worth it. Best wishes. <3